Archives for category: Failed


Carmel Apples are a great summertime treat, unless they’re a week old and stuck to the ground. This great shot comes from the Flickr feed of dno1967b. Best leave this one alone, even though it’s free.

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When you’re having a BBQ, don’t forget to whip up a couple options for the vegetarians. Cseeman did, but as you can see from this Flickr photo, things didn’t go as planned.

Just plain disturbing, courtesy of JVC107 on flickr. We hope like hell that whatever came off your grill this past Labor Day did not resemble this.

(BTW: What gives with all the awful wiener pictures on My Food Failed?)

Hey, we make no secret of our love for Mission Chinese Food. But this dish, their Kung Pao Pastrami, for us mere mortals at least, is just too damn hot. Don’t get us wrong, there’s plenty of flavor there, but when your nose starts burning as soon as the plate hits the table, you know you’re in for some trouble. Actually eating the food turned our sweat glands to max flow, and by the end of the meal we all quietly slunk away to shower off. Essentially, with this one, Chef Danny Bowien blew the Scoville Scale up.

In case you ever wondered exactly where your ground pork came from.  (Obviously, it comes from a ground pork pig.) This particular madness, as captured on Teresia‘s flickr feed, apparently appeared at an Albertson’s in Wenatchee, WA. Personally, we’d opt for a butcher with less sculptural inclinations.

This dude, captured for posterity by bella4u22 on Photobucket, is working so hard to cram this chicken bone down his throat that it appears he’s burst a blood vessel in his eye.  This may be a case of operator error rather than flawed food, but we’re still labeling it a failure of epic proportions. Anyone know the heimlich?

We quite liked the arepas at Moliendo Cafe in Cuenca, Ecuador.  Which is why we were confused that they let a starving frat boy into the kitchen to construct this particular offering.  Beans, ground beef that seemed like it had been mixed with Hamburger Helper, all topped with–wait for it–nacho cheese Doritos.  Yeah, it was kind of awesome in a so-bad-it’s-good kind of way, but when the moisture from the meat turned the Doritos insta-stale, we had to file this one firmly in the failed column.

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